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Some mothers get it all wrong when it comes to parenting. They convince themselves that they can just choose to divorce or to raise children solo without the children developing significant emotional challenges throughout their lives. They have never been more wrong. Surely, there is some data out there that can be used to help bolster their case. However, overwhelming evidence confirms that children are harmed when they are raised without fathers. If you are really concerned about your children’s welfare, you might want to think carefully first or to even get professional advice before you screw up their lives forever.

America is really on a roll! Conversations in recent weeks have focused of how women are now choosing in increasing numbers to give up on searching for “Mr. Right” and get themselves inseminated instead. As a therapist, I have had the opportunity to work with some of those very “unfortunate children” over the years, some of whom would just like the answer to one simple question, “Who is my daddy?” Strangely, a mother’s crappy answer like “I wanted to love you so much that I decided to raise you without a father,” can be one of the worst things one could ever say to a child who wants to understand himself/herself and has no way of knowing anything about the other 50% of who he or she is. While it is true that many women have made significant strides in various areas of our society, it is equally true that some are selfish and backward-thinking in some some areas. Getting inseminated or using sex toys as men substitutes might satisfy certain needs for some women who are short-sighted and probably even abusive, especially to their offspring. Furthermore, regardless of all the positions formerly occupied by men that women now find creative means to fill. There will always be at least one gap in this world that only a man can fill. What do you think!

According to many children; one of the worst times that they encountered throughout the entire divorce process, was when they had to deal with a step-parent. You, the parent, might have known that the marriage was not going well for years. In fact, the “d” word might have been thrown around so much, that when it finally arrived, you welcomed it with open arms and you were already prepared to move on. For your children, however, even though things might have been rocky for years, they had grown accustomed to both parents still being there, and they expected that they would continue to stay together, even though they would fight from time to time. For them, when the divorce finally comes, it often hits them with volcanic strength, and they need time to process it and to heal. They did not bargain for that. Hence, parents should remember that even though they might be ready for a new relationship, and they probably even started one even before the divorce was final, children will need time before they are ready to be introduced to someone new, someone, who they will probably view as the substitute for their other parent. If you want them to heal well and to be supportive, you should wait…wait as long as possible and help your kids heal before you bring someone new to their lives. You owe it to them.

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Recent conversations with husbands of various backgrounds revealed very worrisome feelings about how they feel about their wives. They describe them very negatively, using words like: “disappointed, unprepared, rude, wasteful, selfish, uncaring, neglectful, argumentative, and not knowing how to please men.” Very harsh generalizations,  don’t you think? Are wives really that different today? What do you think? There seems to be reason for concern because these types of complaints are could put already vulnerable families at risk for dissolution as well as affect the welfare of our children. So, what do you think about how wives behave today? I expect many women will react very strongly to this question, based on what husbands are saying. Maybe some husbands could also get their wife’s permission to post a comment?

The timing of your divorce is very crucial. In fact, when you divorce could affect your children throughout their lives. Therefore, if at all possible, do not divorce close to significant dates like major holidays, birthdays or other significant dates. Many children will associate those dates with major losses. Hence, this is something for you to think about very seriously as you embark on the life-altering decision of divorce. For more information on divorce and divorce-related concerns, or to obtain divorce resources by Dr. Percy Ricketts of Pembroke Pines, Florida, please visit www.divorceclass.info.

‘Before you divorce,” get educated on how you and your children could be affected. Get a copy of the small book by Psychotherapist and Divorce Consultant, Dr. Percy Ricketts of Broward County, Pembroke Pines, Florida. Autographed copies are available from www.divorceclass.info. Unless there in abuse or domestic violence, don’t make a life-altering decision before you are sure about what you are doing.

Enrollment in parenting classes since May would seem to suggest that the divorce rate might be increasing again. Hopefully, that is not the case . We can only look forward to data confirming what the real situation is. To enroll in a divorce education class with Psychotherapist, Dr. Percy Ricketts of Broward County, Pembroke Pines, Florida, or to purchase marriage and divorce-related resources, please visit www.divorceclass.info.

It is true - many fathers in America could do a much better job when it comes to their relationships with their children and with their children’s mother. Still, we should never forget that there are millions others, who do an exceptional job when it comes to caring for their children and relating well with mothers. Sadly, in this society, we do a great job of dishonoring and disrespecting fathers, to characterize them negatively and to give the impression that their presence does not matter. We need to place more emphasis on father presence and its positive effects and help help fathers where they fall short. So, this father’s day; hold the tie, the cologne, the socks and the tools. If you were not respecting and honoring dad all year or showing him how much he really matters in your life, maybe it is time for you to reflect on what Father’s Day really means. And mothers - many of you need to be blamed for how children feel about their fathers. Much of the negatives come from you. Remember, the best gift a mother can give to her children, is to show them how much she loves their father and to encourage them to have a great relationship with him. It’s not always easy but it is worth it! Father’s are just as important as mothers! Happy Fathers Day!

How George Survived His Parents’ Divorce is a small book for teenage children whose parents divorced. This book is designed to help children understand what divorce means and to help them cope with this life-changing process. If you are planning to divorce or you recently divorced, and you have teenage children, you can get a copy at www.divorceclass.info.  You can also register your children (ages 6-17 years) for divorce educational classes including the Sandcastles program with Psychotherapist, Dr. Percy Ricketts of Pembroke Pines, Broward County, Florida, at the same web address.If they must adjust appropriately following divorce, children need all the help they can get.